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They grow up developing friendships with the opposite sex and in turn, develop more empathy and understanding of the opposite sex.
In American culture, there is a clear segregation of the sexes, boys play with boys and do boy things and girls do the same.
Then these boys grow up and are exposed to the opposite sex in an abrupt, often sexualized way. This is definitely seen in how they treat not only women, but everyone around them.
The consequence of this is a lack of understanding of women, a lack of comfort and often, a lack of respect. There is a courtesy, consideration, chivalry and thoughtfulness in how they act, behave and engage with others.
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So does this mean the only hope for a happy, committed relationship is to move to another country? As mentioned above, the observations summarized above are not really about where one is born, but rather a mentality that is influenced by societal and cultural values.
We must be aware of our own behavior in the dating game, because we are active participants in how we are treated.
There are a set of ritualized rules that are abided by in American dating culture, and if you don’t play within them, you are labeled as desperate or needy or undesirable.
I’m not to judge that one is better than the other, and mind you, my observations are based on my own experiences as well as a group of women I’ve interviewed in the last two years.
The below is a list of some of the themes and commonalities observed.
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